Sausage and beans
Subtitle: Cassoulet for the man, woman or kayaker in a hurry
This is a remarkably passable imitation so long as you are very careful in choice of the key ingredients:
Slice the sausage and fry (I use duck fat) until browning, add diced onion and continue frying until all browning. Drain the beans and mix them in. Stir dry for a little so they absorb the smoky flavour, then add 150g of chicken stock and simmer, longer the better as long as the beans don't go too mushy or too dry.
That's it apart from two secret ingredients, which I can divulge to you dear reader as first a small pinch of molasses sugar (the really dark, oozy one), added early, and second a small dash of Marsala, added late. Resist the temptation to pinch or dash in too much - just right is best.
Douse with pepper and serve with torn-off chunks of bread, perhaps with a splash of olive oil on bread and beans. As with cassoulet, green vegetables of any kind would be an embarrassment with this dish, which should be served in bowls accompanied by not-too-rough claret (shiraz for me) and argumentative conversation.